Thursday, September 27, 2018

Happiness Isn't In Having What You Want But Rather In Wanting What You Have

A few years ago,  a woman I've known for well over 20 years was in the process of selling her home. Over the years, she and the hubs had posted many photos of their kids, parties they've had, and other general daily life photos. It was obvious from the photos that their home was very big, elaborate, and had a considerable amount of private waterfront property.

I'll refer to this woman as DQ. 

When DQ made the announcement that their home was up for sale, she included a link to the presentation their realtor had made of their home.

Usually, when a realtor/realtor site advertises homes, it's a generic template. There's a copious amount of information about the home along with a few dozen slideshow style photos.

This wasn't the case for DQ's home. 

The presentation was lengthy. I felt like I was watching an excerpt from The Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. The portions of the home, both inside and outside, where photos had been taken had only been the tip of the iceberg in comparison to the entirety of their home.

Yes, I watched the presentation. Their home resembled a small luxurious hotel that included an indoor swimming pool, movie theater, bowling alley, etc. Although stunning, I was not in the least bit impressed.

It didn't take long for people to start replying. The number of replies to DQ's post and the realtor link blew through the roof.

"I would do anything to have a house like yours."

"The photos of your house makes my house look like a shack."

"If I had the money, I'd buy your house in a heartbeat."

"I suddenly hate my existing home."

"I wish I had a house like yours."

"It would be an honor just to spend a day at your house."

"I'm so jealous!"

"Your walk-in closet is bigger than most of my living space."

"I guess we won't be inviting you to our home for dinner because it would be a Dixie Cup in comparison to yours."

The. List. Goes. On.

As I read through the replies, I found myself a little sad and heartbroken. I know a lot of the people who replied. I've seen photos they've posted that were taken from inside of their home.

The homes I've seen are warm and inviting and cozy...just like our Bodacious Home.

Sure, DQ's home was beyond impressive, but it's not our style. It's not something we'd ever want even if we had the money to buy it. I can't even imagine having the attitude of, "I'd do anything to have a house like that."

And, I would never think less of our home because I watched the realtor presentation of DQ's home. In fact, after I watched the presentation, I was

Our home is small. It's fairly old. It has character. We've lived here for over 6 years. We absolutely love it here.

Are there things I would change about our home if we could? Yep. A few.

I'd make the bathroom bigger and have a big enough tub to where I could soak in water from the neck down.

I'd have better and more appealing flooring in the kitchen.

I'd put a ceiling fan in the living room.

Will any of that happen in the future?

The bathroom, probably not.

The flooring and ceiling fan, probably.

Our happiness with our home isn't dampened by the things we'd like to have but currently don't.

We're happy and content with what we have.

In this day and age, a lot of people reside in the I Wish World.

I wish I had a bigger house.

I wish I had a brand new car.

I wish I had a house on the lake.

I wish I had an impressive home.

I wish I had this or that.

Don't get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with wanting to relocate, a better job that pays more, a bigger bathroom, a brand new car.

There is nothing wrong with making changes.


It becomes problematic when you get caught up in the I Wish World because while you're spending the majority of your time wanting and wishing for something else, you're not able to find happiness in what you already have.

For example, a couple of years ago, Lisa expressed an interest in having a woodshop in the basement. There's an old woodshop table already built in. I'm guessing that decades ago, someone had a woodshop there.

Before that could happen, we needed to clear out the basement and get Lisa set up with tools and supplies.

We made it happen. Lisa has had her woodshop for over a year now. She loves it. Lisa has built a lot of gorgeous DIY Dog Mom Projects in her woodshop.

Is her woodshop elaborate? Nope.

Is her woodshop considered "eye candy?" Nope.

Is it a functional woodshop that we spent time and money into creating? Yep.

Are we proud of that woodshop? Yep.

Lisa wanted a woodshop. We worked with what we had for location and space. We saved money for tools and accessories.

It was a labor of love.

There is happiness in that.

Lisa could very easily get caught up in the I Wish World, but she doesn't. We both know when that happens, you lose focus on the greatness that you already have.

When you find happiness in wanting what you have, it's a beautiful thing.

Because, more often than not, you're not going to get what you want.

And, if you attribute happiness to getting what you want, you'll probably be in a constant state of disappointment.


Look around you.

Embrace what you have.

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