Wednesday, June 27, 2018

I Hope For The Best. But, I'm Also Prepared For The Worst

From an early age, I learned to hope for the best, but to be prepared for the worst. In other words, I tend to be hyper-sensitive and hyper-intuitive. I attribute this to a couple of minor TBI's in my lifetime along with experiences that no one should have to go through. Often times, when something is out of the ordinary, I take notice. I focus on that. I plan out every possible scenario. Then, I stress about how I'm going to handle each and every outcome. As of late, I've been honing in on several situations with various possible outcomes.

I do not like feeling this way, but unfortunately, we both have been in situations like this before. It's one of those, "you live, you learn" scenarios.

That's. Life. 

It's one of those situations where you are let in. Doors wide opened. You're hired to have a bit of authority. You honor and respect that. You do your best. You go above and beyond. You bend over backward.


As months roll on by, a year or 2 passes, you start seeing the entire situation as a whole. And you address that. That's when the proverbial hand gets thrown up in the air.

The doors are, one by one, being slammed in your face.

Tables turn.

They no longer want to hear what you have to say.

And, you're standing there wondering what the hell just happened.

During all of that blank space, you're thinking, "We have invested all of this time, and love, and effort into what?"

What just happened?

I say the same thing now that I did a couple of years ago and the response is completely different?

Now we have to walk on eggshells?


That's where I have to run to the front line and take our stance.

The problem is not us. It's not how we're presenting stuff. It's not what we're enforcing.

The problem is now you.

But, as with most situations where you take a stance, there are retributions.

So, as of late, I've been feeling a bit defeated.

I've been isolating myself.

Seeking solace within our home, our kids, and the many chats Lisa and I have had.

The next week will tell all.

I'm hoping for the best.

But, I'm prepared for the worst.

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