Friday, November 3, 2017

This Is What True Love Looks Like In Your 40's And Beyond...

This morning, I came across a story about a woman's viral post describing 'what true love looks like in your 40.' The woman behind the viral post is a parenting blogger. She's a mom of 5 human kids. Not too long ago, she posted a photo of her husband walking into a grocery store. He had a wallet in his hand and a smile plastered on his face. Why did she take this photo?
She was at the grocery store with a full cart of groceries. She was in the checkout lane and realized she had forgotten her wallet. She phoned her husband and he rushed to the store to pay for the groceries. He wasn't upset. He didn't criticize her forgetfulness. He simply walked into the store and was more than happy to come to his wife's rescue.

After reading the article and the original post, I thought, "Lisa would totally do this. If I were that woman in the checkout line with a full cart of groceries and had forgotten my wallet, Lisa would rush to my rescue. She'd have a smile on her face too. 

Actually, she'd be giggling because I can be flighty at times. Really. Really. Flighty.

Throughout the rest of the day, I kept reflecting back to this woman's post and thinking about true love in your 40's. Lisa is 49. I'm 43. Our life is crazy busy and chaotic most days. We have 4 rescue kids and a rescue Guinea Pig. Lisa works long hours outside of the home. My Work at Home Dog Mom Life is exhausting and challenging. 

We don't take vacations, weekend trips, or even day trips. Most weeks, we struggle to leave the house together for a few hours to run errands. The housework is neverending. Meal prep for our entire family requires a couple of hours each day in the kitchen. Date nights are spent at home with our favorite take-out. At the table. Playing cards. With the kids. 

The list goes on...

Needless to say, we're not that picturesque, romantic couple celebrating special occasions with a fancy candlelight dinner and rose petals in the hot tub and on the bed. Our "romantic" evenings usually consist of snuggling on the sofa with the kids under our favorite throw blankets and falling asleep while watching Netflix.

One of us usually gets wakened from the smell of Willa's farts or Sophie snoring, or Coco crawling up one of us to give us juicy kisses or Lobo barking at nothing.

You know what? I wouldn't trade our life for anything or anyone.

My version of what true love looks like in your 40's would include but is not limited to...

Lisa coming home from work with my favorite wine and pouring me a glass. She did that today. It's been a rough week.

Lisa not curling her lip at the music I'm blasting when she arrives home from work. Instead, she grabs one of our kids and dances with them.

Lisa pulling out the kitchen chair and telling me, "Sit and enjoy your wine. It'll only take me 5 minutes to do the dishes..."

Making Lisa's favorite breakfast sandwiches on the weekend and making an extra one because the kids love 'em too.

The Saturday and Sunday mornings when we are able to have coffee together. And, the kids gather at her feet because she has breakfast sandwiches or homemade quick breads. She always shares with the kids.

The many times Lisa has made a quick stop at the grocery store for this ingredient or that ingredient because I forgot to put it on the grocery list.

Lisa spending a portion of the afternoon cutting and sanding wood so I have the materials needed to make DIY Dog Mom Projects.

...or has created something on a whim so I can take better photos of the DIY Dog Mom Projects.

How hard Lisa works for us and our family. Since getting her promotion in June, her work hours have increased. It doesn't matter how tired she is or if she's not feeling well, she gets up early, goes to work, and gives it her all. We've never gone without.

The sweet just-because gifts she surprises me with. Lisa and I don't exchange Christmas gifts. We find it ridiculous to buy an enormous amount of gifts for each other just because it's Christmas and "that's what we're supposed to do." Instead, we surprise each other with just-because gifts throughout the year. Recently, Lisa surprised me with a jar of Ghost Pepper Salsa. She knows I love to feel the burn!

The occasional evenings when I can sneak in a nap. And, when Lisa wakes me up she says, "What do you want for dinner. You've worked hard. I'll buy dinner tonight."

The smile on her face every year, for her birthday, when I surprise her with a lobster dinner. It's not really a surprise, but she loves lobster so much and is always happy when we splurge on this indulgence. And yes, we share the lobster with our kids because they love it too.

It's the quiet and more personal moments I capture behind the lens. Like on this day in July when one of our kids, Willa, had surgery. Lisa laid on the floor to comfort her. They both fell asleep.

When Lisa sits outside with me in the pouring rain, during a storm, while I'm teary eyed and sipping a glass of wine, because life had gotten a bit too loud. It had been a shitty day for me. She didn't judge or dole out advice. She sat. Listened.

The many times we've invited my "SoulSista down for dinner. After a few hours, when Lisa gets tired, she heads into the living room with the kids. I always say, "I'll only be an hour longer...." But, she knows different. Lisa knows I need my wine-sipping-girly-chats. A few hours later, when I wake her up, she doesn't complain. Instead, she asks, "Did you have fun?" When I tell her "yes" she replies with, "Good. You needed it..."

Overlooking my not-so-graceful moments. Trust me, there's a lot of those. Lisa has helped me off the floor after twisting my ankle from stepping on a NylaBone. She has overlooked my tendency to conquer projects on my own that I probably shouldn't have. She has cleaned and bandaged stab wounds I've sustained from our kid's antler bones.

...or she's had to re-pot a tree plant because I tripped over the plant holder in order to avoid tripping over one of our kids.

Again, the list goes on.

One of the most heartfelt compliments I've ever received was a few weeks ago. Girly night. Sipping Lemon Breezes.

"I want a relationship or marriage like you and Lisa have. There is a sense of balance. You both work together. The love you have for each other and your family is incredible..."

Yeah, that's what true love looks like in your 40's.

And, beyond...

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