Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Run Toward What Scares You


Despite being diagnosed with Lyme Disease for the second time in a year and Mono, Lisa went to work today. This is the second time she's been bitten by a tick and tested positive for Lyme Disease in a year's time.  On the head. An inch away from almost a year ago. The medications she's taking are making her miserable and uncomfortable. Thankfully, she took her last dose of Prednisone yesterday. And, she's on vacation next week.

It's been a fairly quiet day. I spent most of the overnight sitting on the sofa. Staring at my screen. Blank. Fingers on the keyboard, ready to type. Nothing.

I'm frustrated. Disappointed with myself. I feel like a failure. The Universe is shimmy shaking once again. I can feel the rhythm of upcoming changes and evolution. Much needed. Long overdue. Much awaited. However, I'm resisting a bit.

Why? Well, because of fear. 

I can attribute my stoic demeanor on the overnight to being aware of the changes I need to make, evolution, and having to re-shift my focus because I've become too distracted with bullshit.

I spent 15 minutes trying to come up with another word other than bullshit, but I came up empty handed. The word bullshit covers it all. 

Many moons ago, when the Universe shifted and oddball stuff started happening, I reached out to a wise friend of mine. I sort of felt like I was feeling now. After my extended rant, she said 2 things to me.

"The Universe is shifting. There will be changes and evolution in the upcoming days and weeks."

And.

"Run toward what scares you."

She was right. She has repeated those words to me several times since. With each and every time, she was right.

Where I'm going with this, I don't know.

Well, actually, I do.

But, right now, I'm exhausted. For the first time in a long time, I think I'm going to crash early.


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