Tuesday, August 23, 2016
This Is My Life. I Own It. I Live It.
The other day I corresponded with someone I hadn't heard from in a long time via phone. After exchanging the obligatory time line of happenings since the last time we chatted, she asked me, "So, how is your exciting dog life going?" I italicized the word "exciting" for a reason. There was a change of tone when the word "exciting" escaped her mouth. This is a person who wasn't supportive when we adopted Coco. After adopting 2 more kids, well, you can only imagine. So, this noticeable tone wasn't accompanied with positive feel goods.
It reminded me of last year when I spoke to an old co-worker of mine. He's a bit arrogant, showy, and a total "poster child" of a has-been who's trying to keep up with the millennials. During our brief conversation, he asked, "How is your little biscuit business going?" Again, the italicized word represents a change of tone.
On both occasions, the tone, when pronouncing the italicized word, was belittling. Maybe even a little dragged out. No, I wasn't imagining the change of tone. It had nothing to do with my sensitivities towards these people, hormones, my mid-life non-crisis, or PMS. It had everything to do with where these people are in their life. Who they are. What kind of people they are.
Regardless of the reasons behind their tone change of a word or two, I don't like it. I take notice. I'm very observant to how people present things, even if it's a single word or a tiny twitch from the corner of their mouth. You won't even know that I know. But, I know. Right about that time, I'll lose interest in the conversation, drop out, and quickly wrap things up.
I'm quite good at it too.
Here's the deal...
You don't have to approve of the path and life Lisa and I have chosen.
You may think adopting 3 rescue kids was "a bit extreme" or puts too much of a damper on all the fun stuff we could be doing.
You might think "our little biscuit business" is stupid and irrelevant and not nearly as great and lucrative as what you're doing.
By the way, we're not running a business. If "you" paid attention, you'd know this.
You might think I'm wasting the valuable experience I've gained in the past decade or natural talent.
You may look down on me as you continue to climb the corporate ladder.
Or, while sipping drinks during your vacation travels.
That's fine.
People are who they are and nothing I say or do will shift people's ways or how they view lifestyles different from theirs.
What I can change is how I respond to belittling tones and opinions and how much time I allow it to make an impact on my life.
How do I respond to it?
I make it known that in order to insult me, which inevitably is the intent no matter how nonchalant, I must first value your opinion. And, I don't.
How much time do I allow it to impact my life?
None.
I'm at that point.
Sip your drinks.
Travel.
Climb the corporate ladder.
Take another crappy has-been head shot profile picture.
Brag of your connections.
Post photos of the high-profile people you're associated with.
Have at it.
Meanwhile...
I'm going to continue what I'm doing. What we're doing.
With pride.
Confidence.
I love being a work at home dog Mom.
I don't need to compare myself with others. I'm quite content with what and who I have at home.
This is my life.
I own it.
I live it.
Carry on.
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