Friday, October 21, 2016

When Favoritism Trumps Professionalism

I wanted to write this blog post in letter form. Those seem to be popular when stuff happens or written to get a point across to a vast amount of people. In the past, I've written a few. However, today, I'm resisting the urge. Those letter-form blogs get stale. Too many people have written 'em. They're safe. It's a style that allows people to dance around the bush. Speak in a sugar coated tongue. Those days are over with for me.

That doesn't mean I'm going to call out people or businesses. There's a fine line between tact and high school mentality.

With that being said, here's what I'm going to open this post with.

I have an aversion towards cliques and the favoritism that transpires from these tight-knit groups.

My dislike towards cliques and favoritism escalates when it involves an establishment, public group, business, etc.

And people's inability to leave stuff at the door.

Especially when it makes an impact on Lisa and/or our kids.

An impact that becomes quite apparent over a period of time.

And it's quite noticeable.

The noticeable-ism stems from various sources. Visits. Appointments. Social media. Replies. Attention.

People tend to forget I've spent the last decade working online. Social media. I am connected to the virtual world 95% of the time.

I notice stuff. A lot of stuff. A reply. Shift in tone. Photos. The absence of likes and replies from various individuals. That's just the tip of the iceberg.

This is where my tact kicks in. 

There's no need to mention who and where.

What I will mention is it happened. And, it's been happening a lot this year with one particular place and a handful of people.

It happened again quite recently. That was the last straw.

Over the past 6 months, we've made some changes.

And, those changes have been in response to how people have treated us, welcomed us (or not), and how their demeanor has shifted after a minor incident involving us and a member or two within their group.

If it involves only one or two members within their group, it should be between us and them. But, it's not.

It never is.

What that translates to is if you have a disagreement or speak up about something with one person, consider yourself shunned and shamed by the entire circle.

I'm guessing the story has been stretched, altered, and shifted to correlate their rendition.

To be expected.

Personally, I don't care what's been said. How they chose to respond to me taking a stand speaks more of their character than it does mine.

What I do care about is how it affects the attitude/s in which we are welcomed, serviced, or treated.

Let me set the stage.

Lisa sits in the waiting room of a business with one of our kids. She is snubbed and ignored by certain staff members even after eye contact is made and a friendly hello is initiated.

These are people who used to welcome us with open arms, friendly banter, and casual conversations.

I'm 150% confident that if someone, within their group, had walked in at that very moment, the atmosphere would change. That person would not be snubbed.

That person would be welcomed with open arms, enthusiastic greetings, and a multitude of acknowledgement.

And, I'm 149% confident, if I were to bring this situation to their attention, they'd hear me out, but nothing would change.

I have a problem with all of this.

A. Big. Huge. Problem.

Here's where I stand.

You run a business. Your employees are like family. You're all tight knit. That means their spouses, significant others, family and friends are family too. This extends the circle.

People within this circle are greeted differently. When a service is rendered, the people within this circle often times get preferred treatment.

Social media provides an abundance of proof in the area of preferential treatment.

Across the boards, these people get gold star everything.

If someone outside of the circle pisses off a member within the circle, or takes a stand on something, it's never between that someone and the person amid the circle.

It's between everyone.

That's when things change.

Noticeable changes.

That's where I am now.

Once again, we're pulling away. This time, completely.

I shake my head in disgust and at the lack of professionalism.

More so, I'm disappointed that it has gone this far.

The loss of our business won't put them under. Not by a long shot.

Lisa and I have enough tact to make these changes without causing a scene.

And, by some chance, which it's already happened, people ask why, our answer is simply, "For personal reasons."

That's it.

End of story.

Life goes on.

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