Life Is So Much Simpler When You Stop Explaining Yourself To People And Just Do What Works For You

One thing that irritates me to no end is being put on the spot. There was a time when it happened frequently. Now, not so much, but it still happens. Even though we've learned how to dodge being put on the spot, sometimes, we're caught off guard and cave. Then, within days, I'm kicking myself in the ass because of the stress level.

One such moment happened last month...

We were enjoying a neighborhood family outing. Someone asked, "Are you having your Halloween Party this year?"

Ugh. 

To back up a bit, Lisa and I moved into our home in July of 2012. That October, we decorated and kept our porch light on and handed out candy for Halloween.

The following year, I started making a big pot of my corn chowder, homemade bread, and dessert for our neighbor friends who wanted to stop by for dinner.

In 2014, the same thing.

In 2015, we had a much larger Halloween Party here. We invited a lot of extra people over. Lisa was able to get November 1st off as a vacation day. The party was a blast.

In 2016, we had a lot of people join us for my annual corn chowder, homemade bread, dessert, and the adult candy exchange. Lisa had November 1st off. We had a fantastic time.

In 2017, a massive bombogenesis storm hit us on the overnight of October 29. In the wee hours of October 30, we lost power. I had to cancel our Halloween Party.

The power wasn't restored until October 31st...a few hours before Trick-Or-Treat. I whipped up a couple of homemade pizzas. We made it work. We ended up having a great Halloween night.

Again, Lisa had November 1st off. 

This year, we had no intention of throwing a Halloween Party. We're in the process of getting Back to Basics. Halloween falls on a Wednesday. I simply wanted to make my big pot of annual corn chowder, homemade bread, and dessert.

When the big question was asked last month, I was put on the spot.

I'll be the first to admit, I caved. All eyes were on me.

I said yes, but at the same time, I was also taking into consideration that a few people in our neighborhood family tribe are not retired.

Having a party on a work night doesn't work.

So, I set a date of Saturday, October 27th.

Then, as time went on, I realized this date wasn't going to work. Between all of the changes going on at Lisa's place of employment and this being our busiest time of year for Bodacious DIY Dog Mom Projects, it wasn't feasible.

Lisa and I rely on the weekends to tackle Bodacious DIY Dog Mom Projects.

Push that aside, what people don't realize is this...

To plan a large gathering at our home, including our Halloween Party, it involves 3 days.

The day before. The day of. And, the day after.

The day before, on Friday, I would be tackling all of the food prep. When Lisa got home from work, she'd tend to the yard work.

We planned on having the Halloween Party outdoors this year. 

On Saturday, I'd be decorating and cooking and baking. Lisa would spend most of the morning and afternoon helping with dishes and setting up the backyard. Shortly before everyone arrived, she'd help with the additional setup and bringing last minute stuff outside.

At the end of the evening, after everyone leaves, Lisa and I and our SoulSista clean up a bit and put out the backyard fire.

The following day, Sunday, Lisa spends a few hours cleaning up the backyard, doing dishes, putting everything away indoors, and getting our home put back in order.

I help out the best I can because, by this time, I can barely move from chronic pain.

Sunday is also the day before Lisa has to go back to work and my hectic Work at Home Dog Mom Life schedule begins.

I'm not going to lie. I hate that I caved when the big question was asked.

I hate it even more that I'm not looking forward to hosting this party for this very reason and a few more.

Lisa and I have gone Back to Basics all the way around.

Back to Basics does not include hosting a big Halloween Party a few days before Halloween and spending 3 days, in one way or the other, prepping and cleaning up.

Yes, on Halloween, I'll be making my big pot of corn chowder along with homemade bread and dessert. Lisa and I will be handing out candy to the adorable trick-or-treaters.

But, I'm fairly certain, Lisa and I are going to cancel the big Halloween Party on October 27th.

I've been struggling with this because of guilt and not wanting to piss anyone off.

But, at the end of the day...

We're not the only ones who can host a Halloween Party.

Between work, being Dog Moms, Bodacious DIY Dog Mom Project Stuff, and everything between, we don't get days or weeks off. We don't have downtime.

At this point, and our commitment to getting Back to Basics, we're done with hosting large gatherings at our home.

What really put my mind at ease was a quote I saw earlier today on a good friend's social media feed.

"Life is so much simpler when you stop explaining yourself to people and just do what works for you."

It made sense.

I can certainly apply this quote to other areas of our life.

More than likely, we are going to cancel the Halloween Party on the Saturday before Halloween.

Some people will probably not be happy and express disappointment, but again, I'm fairly certain no one will volunteer to move the party to their house or help out the day before, of, and after.

We're embracing simplicity.

Back to Basics.

And, we don't need to explain ourselves.