Most days, right around 2:30 in the morning, I wrap up work stuff and give myself an hour to unwind before Lisa gets up for work. I find that watching something on Netflix, reading, or doing a little housework helps to slow my brain down enough to fall asleep. Once she's all set and has eaten breakfast, I snuggle with the kids in bed and try to get a few hours of sleep.
Lately, I've been watching episodes of the X-Files on Netflix. I watched this show every week when it first aired back in the early 90's. I've skipped many episodes. I have no desire to watch every single episode of all 9 seasons.
The other night, I jumped to an episode that began with a displeased boss at a storage unit. One of the storage employees was instructed to clean out a unit. Shortly after opening the unit, he discovered a woman rolled in a carpet. The woman was alive. She was a genie of sorts and granted the man 3 wishes. The woman wasn't able to part ways until he made his 3 wishes.
The man who discovered the genie had always wanted a large boat. He immediately wished for a yacht. His wish was granted and that was apparent when Scully and Mulder visited the man in a run-down trailer park. There was a yacht beside of his trailer.
As the show continued, it was obvious the man wasn't happy with the yacht. The man didn't reside near a body of water. He didn't have the means to transport the yacht to the closest body of water. And, he wasn't able to afford the taxes. Owning such a large vessel became more of an eyesore and inconvenience and he eventually regretted wasting one of his wishes on the yacht.
Throughout the show, the man wished for more stuff, but the outcome of his wishes wasn't what he had intended. He became angry. When he complained about the yacht being useless because there was no body of water close by and not being able to afford the taxes, the genie shrugged.
"You didn't ask for a lake or the money to pay the taxes."
I couldn't shake the moral of the story from my brain. I kept thinking about how the term "I wish" is overused. And when we wish for stuff, we don't think beyond our noses.
I'll use myself as an example.
I have days when I wish I had "normal" work hours. I wish I didn't have to rely on staying up during the overnight hours to get the bulk of my writing completed. I wish there were less interruptions during the day. I wish I wasn't so tired all of the time. I wish my schedule didn't revolve around everything and everyone else.
However.
My life, our life, is the way it is because of Lisa's job. My work. Our 3 kids. Bodacious Biscuit Love. The stuff we do for pet parents in need and the shelter pups. The list goes on.
If the genie, in the episode of the X-Files I watched, were to grant all of the things I wish for during times of extreme exhaustion and stress, I would be in the same situation as the man who wished for the yacht.
Having a normal schedule, not relying on the overnight to get work done, having less interruptions, not being tired all of the time, and not having to revolve my schedule around everyone else is possible, but that would mean having a completely different life than what I have now.
No Lisa. No kids. No Bodacious Biscuit Love. Nothing.
It breaks my heart and makes me sad to sit here and think about my life without all of the above.
I love my life. Our life. Our kids. Our home. The people in our life. The neighborhood we live in. I'm grateful Lisa has a great job and we can afford for me to work at home. I'm grateful that we have been fortunate enough to extend our family over the past few years.
I honestly wouldn't change a thing.
If having all of that means staying up on the overnight to get my work done, fine. If that means frequent interruptions during the day, so be it. If that means my schedule has to revolve around whatever is happening here, let it happen. If that means being exhausted for the rest of my life, bring it on.
Maybe these are the things we all need to think about when we wish for things.
Winning the lottery would be great, but there's a world of problems to deal with when you become a millionaire overnight.
Not having to get up for work would be blissful, but that would mean being unemployed.
We don't think about how different our lives would be if our immediate wishes were granted.
Or what would need to happen, or be eliminated, for our wishes to transpire into reality.
Think about it.
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