Sunday, August 6, 2023

We Will Always Blame It On Alfredo

 


There is a story that circulates on social media every once in a while. It's about a couple who has been married for over 40 years. The wife has been making his lunches for that same amount of time.

On occasion, she would join him on his job sites for lunch. One day, he said, "Lunch tastes better when you share it with someone you love." 

From that point on, his wife would take a bite of the sandwich she packed for his lunch if she couldn't join him.

Since Lisa has been on the first shift, I have been doing the same thing. 

With the exception of ham salad. Or ham sandwiches with mayonnaise. 

I love mayonnaise. I like ham every once in a while. But. I don't like the combination of ham and mayonnaise. 

It's corny and slightly sappy. But. It's our thing. 

We even take it a step further...

When we bought our house in February 2020, it had sat vacant for a few weeks. It's an older house that was built in 1880. 

The addition was built back in the 1960s. 

We have a full basement that is old. 

A month or so after we moved in, I kept hearing a little scuttering in the dining room while reading on the sofa late at night. One night, I looked up and saw a mouse run into our pantry in the dining room. Lisa was sound asleep in our bedroom. 

She always falls asleep much quicker than I do. So. I read on the sofa in our main living room until I am tired. 

On that particular night, I sent Lisa a text letting her know that we had a mouse in our pantry. She got up. Walked into the dining room. Opened the pantry door. And. There it was. A mouse. In the corner. 

Lisa and the mouse had a stare down. 

The mouse took off. 

We never saw it again. 

Or any other mouse. 

But. 

Just in case we did, I named it Alfredo.

Since then, I have been randomly taking bites out of Lisa's meals that I do not share with her. When she was working the second shift, it would be a work dinner or snack. Now. She is working first shift. I make her breakfast in the morning before work. And, she has a sandwich every day for lunch. 

When I grill her a bagel or English muffins for breakfast, I will take a bite out of one occasionally before slathering on the peanut butter or cream cheese. When I make her sandwich the day before, I will take a bite. 

Lisa's reaction is always the same. She'll gasp. Act surprised. Then, a few seconds later, she'll make a comment about how Alfredo stole a bite of her breakfast or sandwich. 

My response is always the same. 

"Oh no! Damn Alfredo!"

We both know that a mouse named Alfredo had nothing to do with it. 

It's all about the sentiment behind the original story. 

Yet, to this day, and always, we will blame it on a mouse named Alfredo. 


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